Tag Archives: meditation

My Zen Teacher

Posted on December 16, 2025 by | Leave a comment
Me, taking my Zen vows (2005)

20 years ago, I took my Zen Boddhisattva vows with my teacher, William Nyogen Yeo Roshi. I found out a few months back, that he had passed away. Known simply as Nyogen Roshi, he was a successor of Maezumi Roshi, who brought Japanese Zen to the United States in 1956 and was widely considered the foremost Zen master of the 20th century. Nyogen Roshi was the last of 12 students authorized by Maezumi Roshi to succeed him as a teacher, and was thus given the title “Roshi.”

My teacher was a true teacher. He cared nothing about accolades or recognition. He was compassionate and simple. He also had a good sense of humor. Most of all, he cared about the Dharma and about preserving it well. In this light, I thought that the most beautiful way to remember him would be to share one of his teachings. This Zen lesson, which I have named with an acronym DER, came from a Dharma talk at the temple where we, the Sangha (community), used to gather on Saturday mornings for meditation, Dharma talk and lunch. To my knowledge, this teaching was never written down, except in my
own book, Buddha in the Classroom; Zen Wisdom to Inspire Teachers (2011). This passage is adapted from chapter 5, in which I am sharing my frustration with my students’ tardiness…
~ ~ ~
In his Dharma talks, my Zen teacher often repeats a three-part teaching: Don’t deceive yourself; Don’t make excuses; and, Take responsibility. Each time he transmits this message to us, he is keeping alive the flame of a living tradition, as did his own teacher, Maezumi Roshi, when he carried the very same lessons forth from his native Japan. The teachings are so pertinent that I remember them as an acronym, DER, for easy retrieval. I always find it appealing that the teachings start with the self, putting us face-to-face with the connection between our own states of mind and our subsequent treatment of others. But looking inward at our own state of mind requires courage. Don’t deceive yourself. 

How often do we mask dishonesty? It takes courage to lay the armor of the ego down and to concede—even to ourselves—our true motives and agendas. This internal candidness transforms us, and in turn, everyone and everything else we come into contact with, either directly or indirectly, which is infinite in scale over the course of a lifetime. We go to great lengths to try to fool ourselves. I remember when I took some change from my father’s dresser as a kid. I told myself that if he had just given it to me in the first place, then I wouldn’t have had to take it. So, it was his fault. Psychologists call it rationalizing.

A couple of years ago, my son bought a vehicle that wasn’t as described in the ad. It was the first time he had handled a transaction of this magnitude on his own. He gave the seller the money and drove away with it, even though all the signs were there—no tags, an odometer reading that was higher than described, and other small peculiarities that were indications of a shady deal. Well, someone could have just stolen the tags, he said, and maybe the guy misread the mileage. He knew he had been bamboozled, and deep down he also knew he had participated in his own deception, telling himself that it was the perfect truck—that it was a good deal, and there was no other like it. He was spellbound, and ended up with undisclosed tickets and back fees on the vehicle. A good lesson, to be sure; but as adults, we’re just as willing to deceive ourselves, and we get ourselves into similar situations. We do it every time we spend money we shouldn’t under the guise of necessity and urgency, because the sale ends tomorrow, or because they might run out—only to look back and see we’ve participated in increasing our own debt. And when we’re truly honest, we can see that it was for things we didn’t really need.

I used to tell my students: If I had to sum up Buddhism in just one statement, I would call it the discipline of letting go. Letting go of what? The ego. The self. The idea of self, and the cloak of separateness the ego-self wears. Every time we deceive ourselves, we drive our ego’s agenda, and we reaffirm that abiding sense of separateness. The ego is normally associated with arrogance, but that narrow definition leaves out its many other masks—such as the one it pokes through every time we refuse to budge from that avowed agenda; every time we find ourselves so rigidly attached to our own idea that we will push it at any expense—even if it means deceiving ourselves.

Student tardiness conflicts with my agenda, so my ego goes to work to control it. But as the disagreeable situation continues, the ego simmers, and the frustrated desire for control and order intensifies. I am a pressure cooker. A look, a word, or a wrong gesture opens the valve and the pressurized steam floods the room. In my head, I blame them, the culture, and the world, and it shows in my demeanor. I deceive myself by thinking I play no role in it at all, and all the while, I exhaust my energy waiting for the world to change. When you blame, you open up a world of excuses, because as long as you’re looking outside, you miss the opportunity to look inside, and you continue to suffer. 

Even as you employ different strategies for controlling the problem, there will always be the students that continue to trickle in late, every semester, for as long as you teach, forever. The idea of confronting yourself first, in the face of something so disrespectful, sounds ironic. Coming in late is clearly wrong, you may be thinking. It’s their fault, and they need to get their act together. Yes, but you don’t want to suffer until they do. You want to be liberated and at peace, able to smile as you deal with these everyday annoyances. The true irony is that when you flip the whole thing over in this way, the annoyances will probably stop being annoying. Pointing outward rather than inward prevents you from considering your own need to control, as well as your own sensitivity to minor provocations. To continue in the context of my teacher’s caveat, DER, it is thus a refusal to take responsibility, and to take your own foibles to task.

Some of my colleagues won’t admit students into the room after fifteen minutes. It’s a reasonable cutoff. One of my son’s teachers locks the door just one minute after the scheduled start time of his aviation class for aspiring pilots and air traffic controllers. One minute might strike you as downright unreasonable, until you hear his compelling and amusing analogy: If this was an airplane, the doors would be locked, and even if you were only one minute late, you would have missed your plane. Ask yourself: Where is your own balance point between “anything goes” and rigid intolerance? Curbing the compulsion to drive our agendas at any expense is part of finding that balance. And how expensive is it? 

Does your inner disturbance ruffle the peace more than the tardies do? If so, that is a quite a tab. Zen’s answer is a compromise, which Buddha called the Middle Path. Just watch them without controlling them, Zen says. There’s an opening of the heart that occurs when you pull back for a moment, into the stillness—when you simply watch. In that space, there is room to turn the light inward and ask honestly, “Why does this bother me so much?” Ask, is this person doing something bad to me personally? The point is not laxity, but inner peace, which has to come first. You have to be peaceful before looking to external solutions.

Like those kaleidoscopes we all had as kids, consider the new shapes and colors that emerge with just a small adjustment. Yes, tardiness seems intolerable, and as convinced as I am that it’s a symptom of undisciplined youth, I can also laugh at myself because I’m starting to sound like the older generations who have always said the same thing. Anyway—and this is the real point—our own spinning minds that toss judgments around like batting machines are even more intolerable than the tardies. That incessant spinning ruins everything, so which is worse? They both cause suffering all around, especially to ourselves.

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The Hindu Notion of God… How To Know Brahman Pt II

Posted on November 23, 2025 by | Leave a comment

Experiencing or realizing Brahman isn’t about believing in an idea—it’s about directly knowing the ultimate reality through the transformation of consciousness. It’s the kind of knowing that can only come from experience.

How do we gain those experiences? Through the Yogas. Although the word “Yoga” is often associated with physical poses here in the west, its roots come from the Sanskrit “Yuj” and means “to yoke,” or rather, to connect to the divine that is within and without.

As I explained in Part 1 of this series on Brahman, in Hindu spiritual teachings, the divine is everywhere… there is nothing that is not divine. The Four Main Yogas highlighted below, explain the pathways to Self-Realization… to realizing that divinity within.

Note that I will interchangeably use expressions like “liberation,” and “Self-Realization,” to convey what can never be described adequately with words… the direct experience of Brahman.

Said more simply, these Yogas are the paths to God…

1.Jnana Yoga (Path of Knowledge)

This is the path of the intellect. It focuses on the philosophical ideas and meditative disciplines taught in the Upanishads and in the Advaita Vedānta.

An example would be Ramana Maharshi’s approach, which emphasizes self-inquiry to realize the Atman, or the little spark of Brahman that lies within. The central practice involves asking the question “Who am I?” to trace the sense of self back to its source and to prompt the realization that the sense of “I” is not a separate entity, but rather, just a stream of thoughts.

This method helps to dissolve the ego and to see the Self as the underlying, unchanging reality. Zen Buddhism is in many ways, a continuation of this path, with the Kensho experience of sudden enlightenment, being not unlike the realization experience of Jnana Yoga. The differences emerge in the context of Buddha’s skepticism of the permanence of the soul.

The idea is that when all identification with the body and mind falls away, the seeker awakens to Brahman — the infinite, formless consciousness — and to the unmistakeable knowing that it is none other than “I.” It was within all along. You are it and I am it and there is nothing that is not it.

2.Bhakti Yoga (Path of Devotion)

This is the pathway of the heart. It is the devotional path, which is emphasized in the Bhagavad Gita.

Here, Brahman is experienced as the personal God — whether we are referring to Krishna, Shiva, Devi, or any beloved form, including Jesus and Mary and all the saints. For the truly devotional, there is no distinction between traditions! They are all Bhakti traditions, and serve as portals to the divine.

I like to say that if Jesus and Buddha met at a gathering, they would find in each other, an instant kinship and would break bread together while talking and laughing into the wee hours of the night. It is we ignorant mortals that like to put a partition between the spiritual traditions.

In Bhakti practices, such as prayer, chanting, and silent devotion, the devotee surrenders his/her ego and experiences the feeling of oneness within.

Eventually, the sense of the separate “I” dissolves, and only divine presence remains, which is another way of realizing Brahman.

3.Raja Yoga (Path of Meditation)

This is the Yogic path described by Patanjali in the Yoga Sutras, and focuses in large degree on stilling the mind. To this end, Patanjali outlines the Eight Limbs of Yoga, which form a cohesive system that begins with lifestyle, then addresses the energies of the body, and ultimately tames the wild horses of the mind, so as to achieve Self-Realization.

In summary form, here are The Eight Limbs of Raja Yoga:

  • Yamas (ethical restraints): My teacher called these the “what not to dos” because they include instructions to avoid harming other beings, and to avoid greed. The idea is not so much to moralize, but rather, to stay away from behaviors that tend to reinforce the ego and the idea of the separate self.
  • Niyamas (observances): While my teacher called the Yamas (above) the “what not to dos,” he called these the “what to dos” because they include things like commitment and surrender, which all contribute to a calm, simple and disciplined life, and make liberation more likely.
  • Asana (physical postures): These are the postures that most people in the west identify as “Yoga” (although the postures are but one step, in a multifaceted approach to Self-Realization!). Patanjali’s inclusion of postures recognizes the body as a more approachable vehicle toward the ultimate goal of taming the mind. The body is more tangible and allows us to break through our physical resistance to stillness as we get better at focusing our attention inward.
  • Pranayama (breath control): One of my teachers would always remind us that “there is only one thing the mind will follow, and that is the breath.” Working with our breath is the most viable way to calm the nervous system and in turn, the busy mind.
  • Pratyahara (withdrawal of the senses): I like to think of Pratyahara as the discipline of managing our external distractions. It’s an application of what any elementary classroom teacher meant when he/she would tell us to mind our own business and stop worrying about what others are doing. We are cultivating the discipline to go inward.
  • Dharana (concentration): If Pratyahara (above) is the discipline of managing our external distractions, then Dharana is the discipline of managing our internal distractions. The ability to concentrate is not always automatic. Our thoughts take us hither, thither and yon, and harnessing the frenzied energy of the mind takes practice.
  • Dhyana (meditation): This is the real objective. This is the ability to sit in meditative stillness. This is what it has all been leading toward. The word “Dhyana” eventually became “Chan” as Indian teachings made their way into China, “Seon” in Korea, and “Zen” as those teachings continued on their journey to Japan. Hence, Zen focuses on seated meditation as a vehicle to enlightenment.
  • Samadhi (absorption): Samadhi is the experience of being absorbed in the divine. In Zen, it is called “non-distracted awareness.” In this state, the individual mind merges with cosmic consciousness.
  1. Karma Yoga (Path of Selfless Action)

Taught in the Bhagavad Gita, this path transforms daily life into spiritual practice. The seeker acts without attachment to results, dedicating all actions to the Divine. The idea is that selfless service (seva) purifies the heart and dissolves the ego — allowing a gradual experience of God realization.

When a man sees, hears, touches, smells, and tastes what is real, and realizes that the Self is Brahman, he becomes free from sorrow.” ~Upanishads

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Buddha’s Four Noble Truths: Part II… The Eightfold Path

Posted on October 25, 2025 by | 2 comments

The Noble Eightfold Path is the fourth part of Buddha’s Four Noble Truths. It is usually stated as Marga, which just means “Path.” Think of it as one path, that consists of eight interconnected practices, which work together to help us liberate ourselves from our own self-created suffering. 

As you’ll recall from the first part of this presentation, on The Four Noble Truths, the kind of suffering we’re talking about here, is the mental variety.

The intent of these eight steps is to habituate the wild-horse that is our mind, into a calm state of awareness. 

It is worth noting that in Buddha’s brilliance, he articulated these steps so as to apply to both the actual practice of Zazen, or seated meditation, as well as to our lifestyle, as a whole. This comes through in their organization: The first two steps capture the basic wisdom of Buddhist teachings, the next three steps all concern our conduct in the world, while the last two focus in on meditation. 

Finally, a note about the context… The Buddha, authentic child of India that he was, responded to the prevailing Vedic notion at the time, that if you practice asceticism—that is to say, give up everything—you could put an end to your suffering. Buddha felt that this was not the way because the “picking and choosing mind,” forever full of preferences will always dominate, so a better practice is to learn how to lean into those attachments, so to speak, rather than make the attachments go away. 

We might look at the eightfold path as the practice of leaning into our attachments, so as to neutralize them and remove their power.

1. Right Understanding (Wisdom). This first step is a reminder that all experience is part of an impermanent and conditioned cycle, driven by the law of cause and effect. 

That is to say, we are all connected and we all need each other to exist. 

Said differently… everything needs everything else to exist. 

Differently still… Everything is totally dependent on everything else. And everything really does mean EVERYTHING… the birds and the trees, the water and the clouds… everything.

This is known as Emptiness in Buddhism, which said in the simplest way possible, just means that every single thing is “empty” of self-sustained capacity (We need other things besides ourselves to exist). And if everything outside of us is just as vital as everything inside of us, then everything is “I.” Or, nothing is “I.” 

I am everything and I am also nothing.

The idea is that, until we see into the nature of reality clearly, we suffer trying to hold onto things (and situations), when nothing is ours to hold onto.

2. Right Intention (Wisdom). This step spotlights the importance of keeping our thoughts in a place of acceptance… because there’s nothing to hold on to! 

On a deeper level, it is also a reminder to check ourselves when we become too focused on our selves, at the expense of compassion for all… because if we’re always focusing only on our own gain, our mind will never be at rest. We’ll always be mentally calculating and clutching. Also, to focus only on ourselves is to forget how we all affect one another. 

The idea is to eliminate the seeds of what Buddha called the “Three Poisons:” Greed, Anger and Ignorance. Greed and anger need no explanation. Ignorance in this context, is to disregard our inter-connectedness. 

3. Right Speech (Conduct). This is the first of the three steps that deal explicitly with our actions in the world and how those actions affect others. The idea is to align our behavior with the quality of compassion. 

Whenever we speak unkindly, we tend to spin it around in our heads long afterward, and this impedes the overall intention of our practice, which is to be peaceful on the inside. We ruminate on all the “shouldas” and “couldas”… “I shoulda said this”… etc. If we become better habituated to speaking simply and truthfully, there’s never a need to second guess ourselves. 

But this requires presence and a keener sense of being conscious… conscious of ourselves, of what comes out of our mouths, and of how people are responding to us. 

How we talk to ourselves counts, as well! Be kind and encouraging with yourself, too.

4. Right Action (Conduct). This is where Buddha’s Five Precepts come in. But I like the way Thich Nhat Hanh refers to them better, as “Five Mindfulness Trainings.” 

Very simply, these are: 

Reverence For Life: Usually stated as “Don’t kill,” this precept is a reminder to be compassionate toward all life. Compassion entails that we regard the lives of all sentient beings, and the plant life that sustains us all, as precious. This is a reminder to align myself with actions and habits that support and protect life, rather than with actions that cause harm. This applies to our eating habits, shopping habits, and overall consumption.

As a side-note, sometimes people like to say that we will never eliminate our footprint here on earth. To this, I say that it’s true… none of us will ever be perfect… but we’re not going for perfection. We’re trying to do better. Honesty, compassion, along with genuine effort will guide us. 

True Happiness: Commonly listed as “Don’t steal,” this precept reminds us that the happiness and suffering of others are not separate from our own, so stealing something that belongs to others is an affront to our collective well-being.

True Love: This precept is commonly translated as “Don’t be promiscuous.” I much prefer Thich Nhat Hanh’s “True Love,” as it reminds us of the beauty and integrity of loving relationships, in which mutual respect is valued. It simply goes to follow that relationships that are not enriched by love and respect are more likely to be motivated by selfishness and to result in abusive or toxic relationships.

Loving Speech and Deep Listening: This precept is a reminder of the harmfulness of lying and gaslighting. The idea is to keep in mind the importance of not causing harm when we communicate. 

Nourishment and Healing: I really appreciate these words, in place of the usual “Don’t intoxicate.” To heal brings to mind the spirit of this precept, which is to remember the power of consumption on all fronts… we consume food, drink, movies, internet material, AI generated material, social media, video games, commercials, and on and on. When we consume in any of these areas, we should be guided by mindfulness, and always consider the impact all of this stuff has on our peace of mind and overall state of being. 

5. Right Livelihood (Conduct). This one is very clearcut, and serves as a reminder to align our work and livelihood with our commitment to reduce harm and suffering to all beings. Very simply put, try to find work that doesn’t involve killing or slavery. Don’t work in a slaughterhouse.

6. Right Effort (Meditation). Now we focus in on meditation. Right effort alludes to the steady commitment to practicing… which is no small thing. At any given moment, there’s always something easier or more “entertaining” to do than sit and face the wall. It takes dedication, to be sure, to get yourself onto the cushion. 

But that’s not the end of it… once you’re on the cushion, it takes constant effort to rein in those wild horses of the mind! Before you know it, they’re off and running, into the past, and into the future, and around in circles, spinning the same thoughts over and over again.

Right effort in meditation means we’re trying, but not trying too hard… which in the Buddhist sense, means we’re pulling ourselves back to the present moment again and again, but with softness and compassion. The result is relaxed awareness.

7. Right Mindfulness (Meditation). Mindfulness is a word that has been adopted into the modern day lexicon and has been used in different contexts to the point that its original meaning has been diluted. To be mindful is to watch. In meditative practice, often a “device” is adopted to help us focus our watchful awareness. Examples are the breath, mandalas for the visually oriented, bells or other sounds for the sonically inclined, or visualization, for those with highly creative minds. 

Sitting, with the sole purpose of watching, expands our capacity for awareness. We begin to see things that evaded us before… because we were distracted by a hundred things, or we were just in our heads. 

We begin to see the roots of our moods… the one thought that started the whole chain reaction of other thoughts, which made us angry. We see the kernel of discomfort… the restlessness, the desire to go lie down, or the impulse to check our e-mail for the tenth time. 

We come to see that with every observation, there is a choice. Whereas before, we never thought we had a choice. We were just operating out of unchecked compulsion and habit.

8. Right Concentration (Meditation). This is Samadhi… What in Zen, we call non-distracted awareness. If the previous step was still doing, this final step is being. Pure being. In Samadhi, our magical insights come spontaneously, the bliss that can only come from deep presence, sparkles forth. The trick is, not to grasp at it or try too hard to maintain it. Like sand, the harder you clench, the faster it slides away.  

*This article was originally posted on Awaken.com.

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Buddha’s Four Noble Truths: Part I

Posted on October 25, 2025 by | Leave a comment
Watercolor by me… Donna Quesada

Throughout the course of teaching Buddhism for 30 years, and authoring the book Buddha in the Classroom, I have thought a lot about how to present the basic tenets of the Four Noble Truths in not only the most concise and understandable way, but in the most relatable way. My first attempt to do that was in the “The 12 Houses of Suffering.” The mini stories presented there show every day situations where Buddha’s teachings apply.

Here is a summarized presentation of the Four Noble Truths…

1.Duhkha. Traditionally stated as “Life is suffering,” this basic declaration is more subtle than that, since what Buddha meant was more mental than physical. He was referring to a kind of chronic dissatisfaction that lies just below the surface most of the time, as we go about our lives.

It manifests as a perpetual restlessness, where we are trying to get something else, or get somewhere else, so that we can feel complete. But of course, it doesn’t work, and we continue reaching.

2.Trishna. This is the cause of the restlessness, which is usually stated as desire, or attachment. Said simply, it is the reason why we suffer… We are restless and we suffer because we are attached to something.

But, a better way to think about this second truth is in terms of lack of acceptance. We are not in full acceptance of what this moment is…

In the Zen tradition of Buddhism, there is an expression… “the picking and choosing mind.” The mind reacts habitually to everything with its preferences and aversions. We like this and we don’t like that. We want this but we don’t want that.

To preempt the natural objection here… which is to say, but what about when a situation really is intolerable? Of course, the capacity for discernment is a valuable one, and sometimes real change is needed.

To this, I will emphasize what my own Zen teacher used to say… “When it’s time to eat, you eat, when it’s time to sleep, you sleep, and… when it’s time to march, you march!”

And then you come back to the beauty that is all around you, in real time.

3.Nirvana. There is a way out of our predicament. Nirvana literally means to extinguish, and in this context, Buddha was emphasizing the importance of blowing out or letting go of the constant craving for something new. There is a beautiful logic to this; If our clinging is the problem, then it naturally follows that letting go would be the solution.

4.Marga. This is the path, or the way to do it. Letting go isn’t as simple as letting go of a hot potato, so we don’t burn ourselves. You see, we’re interesting creatures… even though we see that our constant craving for more and better, keeps us trapped, and thus, keeps the fire of dissatisfaction burning, we continue the pattern because habits die hard.

This is where “The Noble Eightfold Path” comes in. It is the detailed way to reshape our habits, by confronting the mind directly.

Because this fourth Noble Truth is laid out in eight parts, I will summarize it, in all its parts, in a separate article which will follow next…

*This article was originally posted on Awaken.com.

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Meditation On Silence

Posted on March 10, 2025 by | 2 comments

“All of humanity’s problems stem from man’s inability to sit quietly in a room alone.”
~Blaise Pascal


About Silence—

Silence is defined as the absence of sound. I think of it as a tool for personal healing and reparation.
It is the way to maintain sanity.

Silence is also where creativity thrives. By this, I don’t just mean making art, but also, solving problems without force… because in the silence, is a field of endless possibilities, where solutions just pop up, like daffodils in the spring.

Silence enables you to regulate your emotions, also without force.

But, silence is all the more rare, as the world is increasingly saturated with noise.

Thus, true silence is a luxury.

That’s why it’s important to make the time to find a quiet place and just sit. It won’t find you. And if it did, you would likely fill it up with something, anything, to avoid confronting the void.

We all do this, unless we make the conscious decision to sink into it and explore its infinite curiosities.

Like anything of true value, it’s a discipline… a decision to make it a priority and honor the commitment to sit in silence for a chosen amount of time.

Silence is a place to reconnect with your own self… with your own internal world.

The time might be found early in the morning, before everyone else gets up… Or perhaps, if you’re a natural night person, it might be found late at night, after all the early birds have retired.

Some people think that silence is a time to reflect, and to clarify… to think.

But really, it’s a time NOT to think.

You see, thinking is part of the noise. It’s the noise on the inside.

You Can Call it A Meditation, If You Want—

Just watch your thoughts. Take five. But, if you’re too busy, take 10!

I wanted to say, “It doesn’t matter how you sit,” but that’s not true.

It matters. Because when you sit, and not slouch, it communicates an important message to your psyche… that this time is important. Essential. Vital… It’s a part of my mental health regime… a necessary part of my daily ritual, and of no lesser value that other indispensable daily rituals, like going to the bathroom, or brushing my teeth.

The act of sitting says, “This is my time.”

And in that time… and space… you simply sit. Thoughts will bombard you. But that doesn’t mean you’re
thinking. Thinking is when you engage with the thoughts. But, you’re not… you’re just watching them… and also ignoring them. You’re watching them, in the same way I watch the birds gather around the feeder, in the morning… from a distance, through the window, and with love. I stay out of the way and let them do their thing.

They come and they go… the big ones and the little ones. And sometimes they don’t come at all.

A Worthwhile Challenge—

Everyone is looking for “action,” and running from silence. Action means “fun.” Or so we’re conditioned to believe. We ask each other, “What did you DO last night?” And, “What are you DOING this weekend?”

And after a while, we develop a complex… We better DO something!

So, we get busy and make some plans.

We never articulate it in this way, but we resist silence.

We bathe in a world of hyper-stimulation… social media… notifications.

So, part of your silence-discipline might be to Turn Off Notifications on your phone for a designated period of time. Put your phone on the charger with the sounds off for a while. And then sit.

We are like our phones… we need to recharge, too.

Like our phones, we are ON all the time… running… always running, from one activity to the other…

There’s never enough time. The TO-DO list is endless.

But time is relative. There IS time.

The perceived lack of time is all the more reason to STOP. Because then… time stops. You suddenly have more time than you thought, like magic. The lack of time was all an illusion. That “busy-ness”… he’s a trickster!

Taking time brings more time. And space, too… because time and space are ONE.

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Do Your Eyes Work? What’s So Special about That?

Posted on June 20, 2019 by | Leave a comment

Image result for jon kabat zinn

From my recent interview with Dr. Jon Kabat-Zinn, on the question of… What’s so great about now?

What is says in the great Mahayana teachings, the Heart Sutra… there is no place to go. This is the first thing people misunderstand about meditation. Now, I have to sit down and experience something cool. Something found. Something transcendent. Healing… that is better than my ordinary this moment, which is so boring and stressful. And of course, that is getting off absolutely on the wrong foot. It’s not about getting somewhere else. It’s actually allowing yourself to be where you already are.

So, you say, “what’s so special about where I already am?” Nothing, except everything. Do your eyes work? What’s so special about that? Are you breathing? What’s so special about that? Can you think and feel? What’s so special about that? Only everything. So, we take everything for granted, until we lose it. Until our eyes don’t work. Or we can’t catch our breath. Or, it feels like life is falling apart. Or, the body is falling apart.

Donna: I love that metaphor. It’s almost like, dropping in is turning our whole body and mind into a big sensory organ, like the eyes.

Jon: Which it is. The whole body is…

* The Whole Skyped Interview will soon be available to watch, on www.awaken.com (other interviews include, Dr. Dean Ornish, Byron Katie, Caroline Myss, and many others)

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I Don’t Have to Figure It All Out Right Now

Posted on March 20, 2019 by | 6 comments

A very simple question:

What’s the big deal about Now?

I remember one of the advanced monks asking this question to Roshi, at a Zen meditation retreat, many years ago. From Ram Dass’ 1971 classic, Be Here Now, to Eckhart Tolle’s contemporary bestseller, The Power of Now, and the ubiquitous self-help emphasis on mindfulness, it warrants the asking. It has become standard among mental health practitioners to champion this most basic of meditation practices, for its proven benefits for those suffering from depression, to PTSD to the more benign, but inescapable varieties of generalized anxiety, all as common as daily bread. And surgeons recommend it for pre-treatment nerves, as well as post-op recovery. Mindfulness is, at its most simple rendering, the ongoing act of bringing your attention to this present moment… here and now.

Sooo…..

What’s the big deal about Now?

First, let’s answer that question with another question…

Because… What if this moment, here and now, is full of pain and misery? (Why would we want to be present with it?)

The answer to this last question, is that this present moment is not full of anything, at all. It is only our heads that are full of commentary, or as my Zen teacher used to say, ruminations. He loved that word. It comes from the Latin word for chewing. Makes sense. We like to chew on stuff. And chew some more. Then, chew some more. Even when — and there usually isn’t, unless you’re solving some mathematical equation — there’s no nutritive value left in whatever it is you’re chewing on.

Why do we do this?

It’s a compulsion. And we all do it. We are all obsessive compulsive. We’re problem solvers. We want to figure out that which can’t be figured out. We want to solve… even when it’s unsolvable. And know the unknowable. We want to have all the answers, ironically… right now. We’re not so good with the idea that there’s more to come, just around the bend… and relaxing with that. It makes us feel nervous and insecure not to be sure… not to be certain about things. Although, as denoted in the Alan Watts book that started it all for me, The Wisdom of Insecurity, there is an unmistakable prudence in simply letting life dance its dance. We don’t obsess about getting to the end of the dance, or rush to get there.

When we can summon up enough faith to do that, we will have enabled within ourselves a different relationship with this moment.

And that is the answer to the first question… it’s not the now, that has so much importance, it’s our relationship to the now. When we’re living easily with what is happening now, then we will be resistance free. And being resistance free is what every spiritual tradition, everywhere, from the beginning of time, has extolled.

And how do we do that?

After 30 years of practice, I still wouldn’t call myself an expert at it. At all. But, that’s why they call it a practice. It’s never really, fully and finally, accomplished. But, I do like the Abraham-Hicks access code:

I don’t have to figure it all out, right now.

This is like a golden key. A doorway into the state of nonresistance… into a more peaceful relationship with whatever this moment holds. Use it like a mantra. Say it to yourself when panic taps its familiar tap. It works because it’s general. If it were more detailed, and applied to some specific problem, the mind would find some argument, and the ruminations would continue. But in generalized form, it dislodges the ruminations.

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https://fiftyyearsafter.wordpress.com/

 

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Tony Robbins Triad – Seen Through the Lens of Yoga

Posted on August 27, 2015 by | Leave a comment

There are three forces in the world that determine what you feel. These forces are called the Triad. Together, these three patterns create any—and every—emotional state. ~Tony Robbins

In his presentations, Tony Robbins often refers to “the triad,” in which he describes the three ways we can create an immediate shift in the way we feel, emotionally. We already use them all the time! At any given moment, these forces are at work, either working for us or against us. The key is to use them consciously, so that they work for us.

The triad includes: Physiology, Focus and Language.

To be very clear about how these forces work; we have a choice at any moment, to feel—or not to feel—depressed, angry or sad, etc. By working with the three elements from the Triad, we can create the desired shift into joy and enthusiasm.

My point in this article is to show that although this triad, as Robbins uses it, is invaluable, it is also the basis of all forms of Yoga. In one Yoga session, no matter what type of Yoga it is, we effect a transformation of some degree, based on the fact that our moods have a physical basis. As I often say to my classes:

Our psychology follows our physiology just as our physiology follows our psychology. ~Dhanpal

Physiology—

In Robbins’ teachings, an example of changing our physiology would be the simple but profound act of changing our posture and body language. Like a circular transmission, when we lift our heart, lengthen our spine, and soften our expression, these changes send a boomerang-like message out to the world and then back again to our own psyches, communicating a message that was very different than the one we had when we were hunched up under our hoodies.

The most immediate way to alter our physiology is by controlling our breath. In Yoga, this practice is called pranayam. One simple change in our breathing pattern may be likened to a “code” that activates a cascade of internal reactions throughout the body. Each of the various ways that we work with our breath, sends a different code to the hypothalamus, which continuing our metaphor, we may think of as the “central processing system.” This in turn, activates the release of a different alchemy of hormones throughout our body, affecting our overall mood.

One breath is like water on a parched landscape — our body becomes alive with awareness. ~Dhanpal

Focus—

BUT, there’s a great magic that happens when we put our breathwork into synchrony with our focused attention.

In Robbins‘ teachings, an example of changing our focus would be to look at what we can do, rather than what we can’t do. Or, by simply changing our perception of a certain event. He gives the example of Bruce Springsteen, who, before a performance, experiences the same sensations as someone who has panic attacks, complete with sweaty palms and racing heart. Only…he doesn’t interpret these things as symptoms of panic! To him, it means…showtime! His interpretation of these symptoms is synonymous with excitement, rather than fear.

In our Yoga practice, the act of focusing is an exact science! Together, our conscious, rhythmic breath patterns, combined with a drishti, opens a gateway to a higher state of calm-alertness.

One of the most common examples of employing a drishti, or focused gaze, in Yoga, is by holding our concentration at the third eye—the spot right between the brows. In Zen meditation (which may be thought of as a form of Raj Yoga), that focus would be at the tip of the nose, or a few feet ahead, with eyes nearly closed. Additionally, visualizations may be used (more common in the Tibetan traditions), as well as sound.

Unwavering concentration enables us to experience the state of grace in the midst of activity. ~Dhanpal

Robbins reminds us how huge a small change can be. This also echoes the ancient teachings of Yoga. Consider the difference between breathing with awareness and breathing without awareness—from the outside, they appear to be the same activity, but without the quality of focus, they are very different. We could even say that one isn’t Yoga, at all.

Language—

How we talk to ourselves is of utmost importance. We often talk to ourselves in self-defeating ways, saying things like, “this will never work…” or, “”this always happens to me…” or, “I’m such an idiot,” etc. As Robbins explains, these sorts of habitual declarations reflect the crippling stories we are telling ourselves inside our heads.

In Yoga, we use affirmations, such as “I am bountiful, I am blissful, I am beautiful.” But we also use Sanskrit-derived mantras, which work whether we understand them, or not. This is because they work on both a subconscious and an energetic level to create a powerful shift in our emotional state and overall mood.

Sound is vibration and is inherently healing. ~Dhanpal

By combining sound, breath and rhythm, mantra meditation channels the flow of energy through the mind-body circuit, adjusting the chemical composition of our internal states, while delivering our restless minds from distress. Our thoughts are silent sounds. And sounds are electromagnetic vibrations. The more refined our thoughts, the more elevated our vibration; the more elevated our vibration, the closer we get to the highest vibration of all–our own divine nature*

As the captain sets the canvas to the wind, thus pulling the boat out of trouble, it is through mantra that we steer ourselves out of our own stormy seas and into clear waters. ~Dhanpal

So we see that in one Yoga Kriya, posture or meditation, each facet of the triad is put to service!

*For more on the technology of mantra and chanting, see my article here.

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To Drop Your Thoughts or Think Positive Thoughts?

Posted on September 4, 2014 by | 2 comments

intention manifestation

On Dropping Thoughts

If you’ve ever taken up any meditation practice, especially one emphasizing mindful awareness, chances are, you’ve been told to just let your thoughts fall away. The teacher or meditation guide likely reminded you that you are not your thoughts, as a way of encouraging you not to get frustrated by the constant bombardment of mental chatter. Just gently say, “thinking” to yourself, and come back to presence, he or she probably advised.

I call it “going sailing.” It’s a good idea to resist the urge to “go sailing” when you’re trying to meditate because the minute you get carried off on a thought cruise, you are, to put it in one of my own teacher’s words, “in your head.” If you’re in your head, spinning stories and fantasizing, then you’re not really here—you’re somewhere else that doesn’t exist…in a fabricated rerun of yesterday’s argument, or in some imagined future scenario. And the whole point of practicing mindful awareness, is to come to presence.

Thus, learning to take the perspective of “the witness” is an important part of any meditation practice. As a witness, you learn not to identify with these distractions called thoughts. You, in turn, begin to bring spaciousness into your universe, which is actually less poetic and more literal than it seems because every time you gently come back to this moment, you experience reality more fully. By bringing your concentration back to the breath, or your mantra, or the yantra, or whatever tool you choose to use as a focusing mechanism, you detach from the allure of the fantasy.

You unhook yourself from the temptation to spin the story.

There are countless stories in our heads. Liberation from their beguiling appeal is the essence of Buddha’s instruction to drop the endless desires that follow them, like smoke follows fire. We become narrow and myopic when all we can see in our mind’s eye is our story. We get hooked onto the “catch of the day”—the worry, fear, the conversation on repeat, or the anticipated scenario to come. But once we begin to unclench our bite, we begin to see more, hear more, and experience more of our world. This is spaciousness. This is the beginning of what it means to expand our awareness. 

On Positive Thoughts

So, where do positive thoughts fit in? That’s just another form of “thinking,” isn’t it?

There is a useful role, to be sure, for positive affirmations. Cell biologist Glen Rein was among the first to substantiate the idea that our intentions and emotions actually affect our DNA. That the way we talk to ourselves inside our heads can have such far-reaching effects on our well-being, so as to cause changes at the cellular level is more than just fascinating, however—it is empowering. It means that we have more control over our physical, mental and spiritual health than we imagined. 

The implication is that, if you can work skillfully with your thoughts and commit to talking to your self with kindness and conscious intent, then you can achieve what the scientist describes as…a heart-focused, loving state and live in a more coherent mode of physiological functioning. That’s the whole key; working with thoughts consciously, not willy-nilly.

One of the most powerful ways we can heal ourselves is by thinking positively.

As an analogy to thoughts, consider actions, in general. In philosophical ethics, we distinguish between negative commands and positive commands: The things we shouldn’t do, like stealing, and the things that are good to do, like sharing. In this way, we reduce harm in the world. Generally, the “don’t do’s” are absolute, whereas the “do do’s” are optional. 

As an example, consider this situation: If I remove myself from society, say, by going off to live in a cave somewhere, I reduce the likelihood of causing injury to anyone—I’m practicing “not doing.” This would be akin to dropping thoughts. But this is impractical! We all have lives to live, people to talk to and things to. So, this brings me into the realm of positive action and the need to be more conscious of how these actions will play out in the world. 

We don’t have control of the infinite trail of karma over time and space, but with good intent, I simply increase the chances of a positive outcome. This is akin to positive thoughts in the world of our body-mind and the far-reaching ways that affirmations can heal not only ourselves, but our world, as well.

The reach is actually infinite, considering the way that these internal vibrations, called thoughts, will reverberate through our cellular structure, the fabric of our emotions and, like wakes behind a boat…outward, through our energetic projection, our words, our choices, our purchases, our conversations and everything we do. 

Thinking positively may be seen as the active component of our practice, where mindful awareness is the softer, more passive part. It’s like reaching out for the apple rather than waiting for it to fall. It’s recognizing my role as the creator of my universe and my power to manifest my health and well-being. It is the Yang to the Yin.  

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Watch Donna Quesada talking about this topic on Youtube:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WI9Dh0OQsK8&list=UUxc0a3y2axlhrEPmgoGuk9Q

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I Forgive You

Posted on March 11, 2014 by | 4 comments

ForgivenessI spent the weekend at a meditation workshop. It was the second of three total weekends, that together compose the advanced training, in Kundalini Yoga, called “Mind and Meditation.” It was long, intense and exhausting, but also rich. The lecture-based explanations on all the facets of the mind and how it works, nourished our intellect, while the meditations and group sharing, enriched our hearts and spirits, through direct experience.

There were moments where I was so tired, I just wanted to go home and lie down with my dog. But there were other moments that left me truly transformed.

The sweetest of those was a 31 minute meditation led by my teacher, on guitar. He has a way of putting mantras and words to rhythms that are so lovely, they feel like an enchanting love song washing over your soul. (Well, mantras are love songs, after all.)

The words in this particular meditation were simply, I forgive you. It started softly and then it grew, as the intensity naturally and organically progressed, over the 31 minutes. The funny thing is, I don’t remember if he mentioned that it would be that long. I had the idea that it would only be a short, five minute, lightweight, fun chant to start class with. I was wrong. It kept going…and growing. And once we were deep into it, I sensed I wasn’t the only one wiping my eyes.

What is genuine forgiveness and how will it set us free?

1.  Firstly, what it is not. It is not to condone anything. It is not necessarily to do anything, at all, in the conventional sense. Thus, it doesn’t mean taking your abusive ex back, or bringing back into your life people who have harmed you in some way. As Guru Singh put it, it is not saying, “what you did is okay.” It is simply saying, “what you did is what you did.”

2. It also is not mere acceptance. Although it is a fine place to start. One of my favorite writers, Caroline Myss, refers to the inability to forgive (oneself or others), as the strongest poison to the human spirit. It drains our energy more than anything else. Lack of forgiveness cuts into the core of our ability to enjoy life, because as long as we are doggedly holding on to some injustice, we are investing emotional resources into it, to keep it alive, to maintain our status as victims. This attachment, to the past, to the event, to the story in our head about the occurrence, is like an invisible, heavy-duty, elastic band that prevents us from moving forward. And we are the ones who suffer most—not the other. So, although we still need to go deeper, acceptance begins the process of dislodging the story that is holding us hostage. In short, acceptance may be seen as the birth place of letting go, but it is still in the domain of the mind.

3. Genuine forgiveness goes deeper than the mind. It is a matter of the heart. And it’s not even about the other, at all. It is about our own relationship to the past. And in order for the heart to forgive, it has to feel the feelings, in order that they may pass through and evaporate of their own accord…as things always do when we don’t resist them. This means welcoming the hurt and the pain. You have to go there, to go forth. And in that moment, when the tears may flow, you liberate your spirit from those invisible tethers. This is true forgiveness and it is also true healing.

To forgive means to give forward from a memory into the present moment. ~Guru Singh

Image by Nayarts

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